Let the Cat Out of the Bag

Tonight at dinner time, out of the blue, our son Jason asked me if I ever had cancer.  I was caught off guard and didn't know what to say, and so was Mark.  There was silence.  Both our sons looked at me, waiting for an answer.  Jason repeated the question.  Did I ever have cancer?  I mustered enough strength and finally admitted to them that I did.  I hate lying to them.

After all this time, it is only now that we talked openly to our kids about my illness.  I wasn't sure how they would take it.  But you know what, being the kids that they are, they took it lightly.  I was relieved. 

Jason asked if I had the easy or serious cancer.  I told them cancer is never easy and it was serious.  I reminded them about the time I was sick and was in our bedroom most of the time.  We explained it the way they would understand it.  I also told them that I was sick when I started to lose my hair.  Mark explained that it was the treatment that caused the hair loss.  Joshua candidly said "Oh I thought you lost your hair because you had your haircut using number zero" (referring to the buzzcut clipper number).  Mark and I burst into laughter.  It was so funny and I guess that made it easier to explain to them about cancer.

They asked more questions like when will I get my hair back and why do I have to cut it all the time.  I explained that it's very slowly coming back and that I have to have it trimmed to look nice.  Jason asked why I'm still taking medications and we said it's part of the treatment but not as bad as before.  I didn't want to discuss it anymore so I ended it on a happy note.  Told them it was serious but the good news is it's over and I'm doing well.  They seem to be happy with that.  The topic changed as quickly as it started.

That was totally unexpected but I guess it was bound to happen.  Jason's older and a little wiser.  They're also studying science and health at school.  So I thought it is only a matter of time before he puts the pieces together and figure it out.  In a way I'm happy we can discuss it with them now.    Like I say time and again, everything happens for a reason and there is a time and place for everything.  Tonight was the perfect time to tell them and let the cat out of the bag.