The other night, my friend B called, she is also a breast cancer survivor and who was instrumental in keeping me sane while I had chemotherapy. She is one of the good things that happened during my battle against breast cancer. We compared notes, boosted each other's morale and we both can relate about everything that happened to us during that difficult time.
We've kept in touch every now and then but I never had the guts to tell her about the recent health scares I've had. I didn't want to upset her with the news and really didn't know how she would react to it.
I saw her brother recently and told him what happened to me. Shortly after that, B called me. She was surprised I never told her. I explained. B was a bit disappointed and said we are like a married couple, we should be there for each other through thick and thin. I was wrong, she was a lot tougher and stronger than I thought.
Anyway, I'm glad we talked and also glad that she knows about it. We hardly see each other and yet she is one of the closest friends I've ever had. It is hard to find friends like her but she is a true friend indeed.
Thursday, September 23, 2010
Tuesday, September 14, 2010
Hairy-Scary
Call me vain but I am really frustrated with the current state of my hair. It's been over a year, almost 16 months, after my chemo and the top is still thin. What should I do to make it thicker?!?!??!
I've been using paraben/sulfate free/organic shampoos like an aloe vera or Burt's Beeswax Volumizing shampoo/conditioner. No luck there. Two weeks ago I tried using raw eggs coz I've read, and someone also told me, that it makes the hair thicker. Hmm, the jury is still out on that one. Maybe it will help if I do it more often, the egg treatment. I also read that the extracts from an aloe vera plant helps, but I do not have such plant. A former co-worker recommended using coconut oil, overnight for a few days. Tried that to no avail. Another website recommends using olive oil or flax seed oil to make it shiny and thicker, maybe I'll try that too. The last resort I can think of is to shave my hair. Not totally but just a tad bit, to even it out, and like what some folks will say, it will make the hair thicker. Hmm, what to do, what to do?
I am getting desperate. I still wear the wig because I'm so self conscious about the bald spot on my head. My mom/brother thinks the wig could be preventing the growth of my hair since I wear it all the time. Hmmm, good point but I will not go to work without the wig. I get paranoid if people stare at my head. Having a thin set of hair especially on the top is kind of scary. I miss my old hair, it was my crowning glory. These days, it's hairy-scary. ;)
I've been using paraben/sulfate free/organic shampoos like an aloe vera or Burt's Beeswax Volumizing shampoo/conditioner. No luck there. Two weeks ago I tried using raw eggs coz I've read, and someone also told me, that it makes the hair thicker. Hmm, the jury is still out on that one. Maybe it will help if I do it more often, the egg treatment. I also read that the extracts from an aloe vera plant helps, but I do not have such plant. A former co-worker recommended using coconut oil, overnight for a few days. Tried that to no avail. Another website recommends using olive oil or flax seed oil to make it shiny and thicker, maybe I'll try that too. The last resort I can think of is to shave my hair. Not totally but just a tad bit, to even it out, and like what some folks will say, it will make the hair thicker. Hmm, what to do, what to do?
I am getting desperate. I still wear the wig because I'm so self conscious about the bald spot on my head. My mom/brother thinks the wig could be preventing the growth of my hair since I wear it all the time. Hmmm, good point but I will not go to work without the wig. I get paranoid if people stare at my head. Having a thin set of hair especially on the top is kind of scary. I miss my old hair, it was my crowning glory. These days, it's hairy-scary. ;)
Thursday, September 9, 2010
Oh what a relief it is!!!
The results are in! The pathology results of the tumor. I am happy to share the good news that the doctors did a fantastic job of taking off the tumor and the results were negative. Oh what a relief it is!!!
It feels so good to hear Dr. C2 say the magic words 'congratulations, we took everything out and the results are negative'. It definitely put a smile on my face :)
What's next? The palate is healing well and I will have to go back in four weeks for another follow-up. I still have to use the stent (mouth guard) until it is comfortable enough for me not to use it. Solid food is back on the plate but I should still exercise caution that it does not affect the area. The pains? They said it will get easier as the weeks go by and to continue taking Tylenol 3 if the pain is unbearable or the liquid Advil if it is.
Again I say, oh what a relief it is!
It feels so good to hear Dr. C2 say the magic words 'congratulations, we took everything out and the results are negative'. It definitely put a smile on my face :)
What's next? The palate is healing well and I will have to go back in four weeks for another follow-up. I still have to use the stent (mouth guard) until it is comfortable enough for me not to use it. Solid food is back on the plate but I should still exercise caution that it does not affect the area. The pains? They said it will get easier as the weeks go by and to continue taking Tylenol 3 if the pain is unbearable or the liquid Advil if it is.
Again I say, oh what a relief it is!
Monday, September 6, 2010
Shifting Gears
Lately I've been feeling like crap because of the surgery. Like shifting gears in a car, I could be on park, neutral, reverse or drive (sleeping, weak/normal, in pain or feeling fine, respectively). It is different everyday.
Saturday I felt crappy, dizzy and was in pain. Yesterday I woke up dizzy and so weak. Today I'm on neutral, a little weak but kind of normal. Almost everyday since the surgery I've been trying to psych myself to go back to work, but I could feel normal today and not tomorrow. Today for instance I feel like I'm ready to return to work tomorrow but I'll play it by ear how I feel tomorrow morning. Some people might recover faster than I do, but like the doctors said, each person recovers differently from the other.
For the first time since the surgery, the wound bled last night after brushing my teeth. It was gushing and my stent was all red. Gross! I had to put a gauze in my mouth to stop the bleeding. It did after a few minutes. I do not know if that is good or bad. It feels like there is a hole in the wound. Yuck. Shifting gears to reverse, back to square one, the day of the surgery. It was uncomfortable and feels icky.
It is Day 12 since the surgery and still wearing the stent, possibly for another couple of weeks or so. I've slowly started eating solids. Uncomfortable as it may be and after chopping or mashing the food to pieces, it feels good to eat regular food. Paranoia sometime sets in with the thought that the palate will be infected but with the prescribed mouth rinse I think it should be ok.
It is kind of frustrating how unpredictable my condition is every day. I just hope I can pass this "driving" test, get my license to drive, drive to the road to recovery, sooner than later.
Saturday I felt crappy, dizzy and was in pain. Yesterday I woke up dizzy and so weak. Today I'm on neutral, a little weak but kind of normal. Almost everyday since the surgery I've been trying to psych myself to go back to work, but I could feel normal today and not tomorrow. Today for instance I feel like I'm ready to return to work tomorrow but I'll play it by ear how I feel tomorrow morning. Some people might recover faster than I do, but like the doctors said, each person recovers differently from the other.
For the first time since the surgery, the wound bled last night after brushing my teeth. It was gushing and my stent was all red. Gross! I had to put a gauze in my mouth to stop the bleeding. It did after a few minutes. I do not know if that is good or bad. It feels like there is a hole in the wound. Yuck. Shifting gears to reverse, back to square one, the day of the surgery. It was uncomfortable and feels icky.
It is Day 12 since the surgery and still wearing the stent, possibly for another couple of weeks or so. I've slowly started eating solids. Uncomfortable as it may be and after chopping or mashing the food to pieces, it feels good to eat regular food. Paranoia sometime sets in with the thought that the palate will be infected but with the prescribed mouth rinse I think it should be ok.
It is kind of frustrating how unpredictable my condition is every day. I just hope I can pass this "driving" test, get my license to drive, drive to the road to recovery, sooner than later.
Thursday, September 2, 2010
Oral Update
Today was follow-up check-up day and to my surprise Dr. C2 was on vacation. Drats!!! I asked his team a few times before we made today's appointment if he will be there to meet us, they all confirmed he will, including his assistant whom I talked to the other day. This is the second time this happened to us.
I saw two residents instead. Resident 1 saw me first and immediately said the pathology results are not in yet. I said that's fine I came here for a follow-up and wanted to see Dr. C2. That's when he told me the surgeon is on vacation. Grrr! Resident 1 checked the palate and thought I had an infection (the white stuff) so he consulted Resident 2.
Resident 2 looked at the palate and did not agree that it was infection. The white stuff was actually a tissue growth and the palate seems to be healing as expected. Then I bombarded her with questions about the aches and pains I've been having. They are not sure what causes the headaches. However, they explained that the mouth/throat hurts because the nerves surrounding the palate were traumatized. It will take a while before the pain completely goes away. The pain from swallowing is caused by some sort of tear in the throat. Their recommendation was to gargle with warm water and baking soda 2-3x a day to relieve the pain. They suggested that I take extra time off work if the aches and pains persists. We'll see how it goes.
The million dollar question I've been meaning to ask was if I could go back to eating solid food. They said I could, without the mouth guard, as long as I make sure the palate will not be compromised and also to ensure that it will be cleaned and sterile after I eat to avoid infection. Hmmmm, it sounds complicated. In other words, they highly recommend that I stick to the liquid diet and continue using the blender for another week. Darn it!
Resident 2 also checked the other stent (mouth guard) for eating. The reason why it keeps coming off when I tried to use it last night was it didn't fit right. Crap. Now I'm stuck with using only one stent and have to be careful with it coz it breaks easily. On the other hand, Resident 1 cleaned the palate with salt water and also washed the two stents. He prescribed a mouth wash that will help treat the palate to avoid infection.
Anyway, I was really happy when they gave me the thumbs up to brush my teeth with toothpaste. Such a simple thing but believe me I was thrilled. The first thing I did as soon as we got home? Brushed my teeth like I never did before. It felt so good!!!
What's next? We're scheduled to see Dr. C2 next week, this time to get the pathology results if it is ready. I'm hoping that it will be good news, keeping my fingers crossed. And like always that will be another chance to provide you with an oral update. :)
I saw two residents instead. Resident 1 saw me first and immediately said the pathology results are not in yet. I said that's fine I came here for a follow-up and wanted to see Dr. C2. That's when he told me the surgeon is on vacation. Grrr! Resident 1 checked the palate and thought I had an infection (the white stuff) so he consulted Resident 2.
Resident 2 looked at the palate and did not agree that it was infection. The white stuff was actually a tissue growth and the palate seems to be healing as expected. Then I bombarded her with questions about the aches and pains I've been having. They are not sure what causes the headaches. However, they explained that the mouth/throat hurts because the nerves surrounding the palate were traumatized. It will take a while before the pain completely goes away. The pain from swallowing is caused by some sort of tear in the throat. Their recommendation was to gargle with warm water and baking soda 2-3x a day to relieve the pain. They suggested that I take extra time off work if the aches and pains persists. We'll see how it goes.
The million dollar question I've been meaning to ask was if I could go back to eating solid food. They said I could, without the mouth guard, as long as I make sure the palate will not be compromised and also to ensure that it will be cleaned and sterile after I eat to avoid infection. Hmmmm, it sounds complicated. In other words, they highly recommend that I stick to the liquid diet and continue using the blender for another week. Darn it!
Resident 2 also checked the other stent (mouth guard) for eating. The reason why it keeps coming off when I tried to use it last night was it didn't fit right. Crap. Now I'm stuck with using only one stent and have to be careful with it coz it breaks easily. On the other hand, Resident 1 cleaned the palate with salt water and also washed the two stents. He prescribed a mouth wash that will help treat the palate to avoid infection.
Anyway, I was really happy when they gave me the thumbs up to brush my teeth with toothpaste. Such a simple thing but believe me I was thrilled. The first thing I did as soon as we got home? Brushed my teeth like I never did before. It felt so good!!!
What's next? We're scheduled to see Dr. C2 next week, this time to get the pathology results if it is ready. I'm hoping that it will be good news, keeping my fingers crossed. And like always that will be another chance to provide you with an oral update. :)
Wednesday, September 1, 2010
Septem-brrrrr
I cannot believe it is already September. Where did the summer go? If I had the power to rewind the clocks of time, I will make summer longer than winter. That probably holds true to most Canadians/Americans.
In the Philippines, it is different. The first day of September marks the beginning of the "ber" months (September to December). One can here the song "It's Beginning to Look a Lot Like Christmas" or any Christmas carol played on the airwaves/TV shows. Owners of malls and all types of establishments adorn their stores/businesses with Christmas decoration. Christmas is definitely in the air. Some will find it really weird, but it is the culture back home and that's what make Christmases back home extra special.
Here in our neck of the woods, the good ol' North America, summer's about to say adieu and autumn is just around the corner. I hate to say it but winter is not that far away. Last week on the way to Ottawa I saw some trees began changing colours, it's beautiful but kind of sad because the thought of the long winter months is depressing. We really cannot complain, we have had gorgeous summer weather this year. We just wish it was longer.
In the Philippines, it is different. The first day of September marks the beginning of the "ber" months (September to December). One can here the song "It's Beginning to Look a Lot Like Christmas" or any Christmas carol played on the airwaves/TV shows. Owners of malls and all types of establishments adorn their stores/businesses with Christmas decoration. Christmas is definitely in the air. Some will find it really weird, but it is the culture back home and that's what make Christmases back home extra special.
Here in our neck of the woods, the good ol' North America, summer's about to say adieu and autumn is just around the corner. I hate to say it but winter is not that far away. Last week on the way to Ottawa I saw some trees began changing colours, it's beautiful but kind of sad because the thought of the long winter months is depressing. We really cannot complain, we have had gorgeous summer weather this year. We just wish it was longer.
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